40 weeks prego
In my feelings, that’s where I’ve been for a couple of months
In my good feelings though, some of them have been strangers to me.
To tell you the truth I didn’t know they existed.
I’ve been living in a happy universe
A world full of joy, happiness and satisfaction
A world I thought was non existent before
A world full of peace and contentment
To tell you the truth, it cometh from the Lord

I’ve been on a journey
The greatest journey I ever took
A journey so fulfilling, I wouldn’t mind walking it again
It has been a journey of a thousand miles
A journey of 42 weeks
A journey of 9 months
A journey of womanhood

It didn’t start off as an easy task
No, not at all
To tell you the truth
It caught me by surprise
My intuition hinted it to me though
I was scared at first
Being a first for me
I didn’t know what to expect
I guess that’s what we call fear of the unknown

I have been in my best feelings
Most of the time at least
At first I thought I wouldn’t make it
It was tough, the changes that put me down for a while
I became a stranger to myself
The hormonal changes
That came with nausea
And a lack of appetite
Yes I lost a number of pounds
I was a shadow of my former self

Then came the fear
Of the change in my physique
I didn’t know if I was ready to embrace the changes
I wasn’t sure if I was ready to embrace motherhood
I was uncertain of what would result from this journey
The stretch marks, the baby fat, the pimples, the protruding belly
I doubted if my body would return to its former self
I wondered if I would still be beautiful with a bump

Dressing was also one of my concerns
Was I ready to embrace a mode of dressing that was not my style?
I actually had no idea of what to wear as the weeks went by
I didn’t want to loose my identity
But comfort was of the essence
I realized that change was necessary
That I had to embrace my pregnancy
To embrace my new body
To embrace the changes that resulted from it

Every week came with something new
The nausea
The lack of appetite
The weight loss
The congested nose
The Cravings
The farting
The swollen feet
The kicks, oh the feeling was heavenly
The protruding belly
It was a beautiful disaster

Then the journey came to an end
I called it the end of the beginning
Because it introduced me to my true self
It introduced me to a new adventure
My greatest adventure yet
I fell in love with my little human
In him I saw myself
And the man I love more than life
We became two in one

I wanted to love you so hard, like I’ve never loved anyone before
How could I not, when you are the best thing life could offer
I wanted to embrace you, so tightly and never let go
I wanted to protect you with my own life
And as long as I live, I promise you
That I will love you, embrace you, protect you, adore you
I will be everything you will ever wish and more

I will guide you as you grow
I will teach you everything you need to know
So that you can make it in this tough world
I will be there for you
To hold your hand through the tough times
To laugh with you during the good times
To wipe your tears when the times get tough
To encourage you when you feel defeated
To caution you when you are going too fast
To lift you when you are down
To scold you when you need a good beating

I pray to the heavens that, it grants me a forever with you
Because I want to love you till eternity
I want to have you in my life for as long as I live
I want to continue experiencing the joy that you brought into my life
I want to explore your world and discover who you are destined to be
Because you my boy, saved me from myself

17 thoughts on “IN MY FEELINGS

  1. Wow! And as a mother to my nephew, always keep him in your prayers.A mother’s prayer is so strong.

    1. Thanks love, I know that immense love that is more than words. Wishing you God’s grace in your motherhood journey.

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