I have learnt the value of spending time with myself, knowing myself on a deeper level, mastering my self. I have come to enjoy time with my self to the point that I now long for it, yearn for it and crave for it. I have mastered the art of silence, listening to the voice of God, sounds of nature, meditation. I have treasured relaxation, letting go of everything and just breathing. I have tried to pray, at least twice a day. I must confess I’m still not a master at this, but I plan to try; to do my best. I have learnt to master my weaknesses, that way I can master my strength. I have come to appreciate the value of life, the grace to rise every morning, I’ve learnt to treasure each moment, to embrace every moment. I don’t take it for granted anymore.
I’ve understood the value of service. Service rendered with a pure heart, with no expectations whatsoever. I’ve known that what matters in service is helping the other person with no reservation and I’ve understood that it’s fulfilling, satisfying in fact. That’s what counts at the end if the day. As much as it could be challenging, demanding and even tempting, if you have the heart, you will be contented at the end of the day. I’ve learnt to treasure the company of colleagues, the value of teamwork, embracing people with different School of thoughts from mine; the importance of tolerance in the workplace.
I’ve appreciated the importance of change. It might be just what you need to start over, to see the other side of life, to value the things that you have, to appreciate cultural diversity in our country and to understand the importance of coexistence. I’ve learnt to embrace change even if I don’t expect it, I’ve understood that it could be God’s way of answering a prayer. Blessings may come in abundance but may require sacrifice; change and acceptance. I’ve Learnt to accommodate people that are different from me, they are unique in their own way. I’ve learnt to adapt to new environments, new situations, new people and a different way of life.
I’ve conquered the fear to take responsibility, to handle tasks that may look difficult to execute at first and to face life head on. I’ve come to accept my mistakes, to take responsibility for my actions, learn and grow from them. I’ve understood that planning is key, that preparation is key before tackling any task or situation. I’ve learnt to trust my gut, to pray and seek God’s consent before making an important decision. I’ve learnt not to make irrational decisions especially when I’m angry or upset, I’ve come to understand that the decisions I make may affect the lives of the people around me and the people I love.
I’m trying to learn how to obey authority. It’s not easy for me but somehow I’m getting by. I’m trying to curb my quality of doing that which I want. I have now understood that people need to follow laws and that laws need to be there to govern people, to help society function appropriately. I’m having a little struggle with keeping time, after all I’m not a morning person. Sometimes I want to sleep longer but then I fight that temptation. I realize that I asked God for the things I have now and that I have to work my ass off to show Him that I really deserve that and more. He has been with me, God that is. He has been very faithful, walking with me through the struggles and showing me the way.
I’m still trying to get used to being around people all day, I was never really into that. See, I’ve always been a loner, keeping to myself most of the time. Now I have to be out all days of the week, associate with people, talk to people, listen to people, accept their opinions without imposing my own opinions on them. Of course I’m trying to learn to listen more and talk less, to really understand what they are trying to communicate. I’m learning not to be too quick to judge, to learn more about people and their circumstances, their backgrounds and appreciating the diversity in humanity.
I cannot forget to mention that I’m still praying for patience, at least a little more. I’m not so good at that. As much as I know it’s not a virtue of mine. I’ve grown a lot in these, I cannot forget to acknowledge that, at least it confirms that my prayers are being heard. I am positive that it will get better with time. I’m also struggling with fear, fear of the unknown mostly but I’m also trying to master faith so that I can conquer fear. At least I’m learning to eliminate thoughts of Fear from my mind and instead replace them with peaceful thoughts, reassuring thoughts and comforting ones.
I’m hoping to be a better writer, to get more insight, to go deeper into my heart and soul and reconnect with my creativity. To understand the source of my motivation and the direction my writing is taking. Sometimes I doubt if I’m doing enough, investing in this passion enough or maybe I’m still tasting the waters. I know what I hope to achieve in terms of writing but sometimes I wonder if I really know how to go about it. I know God will reveal it to me in due time, after all I’m supposed to trust the journey, ain’t I? I’m not worried about that, nor the future I know God’s will will always prevail and I hope his will prevails in my writing.
To achieve absolute positive thinking is my main desire and not just achieve it but practicing it as well, living it. I’m on my way there at least I have the will and the way, I just need to internalize it and it will eventually actualize. It’s not easy, that’s for sure, but I’m willing to do more so I can be more. So I’m trying to feed my mind with positive thoughts, positive sceneries, positive ideas. I’m trying to seek spiritual transcendence, to understand God on a personal level, to build a relationship with Him for I know I cannot achieve total positivity without God being part of the deal.
4 thoughts on “2017 ITS A WRAP! ”
What a poetic write up of personal reflection!!! Our society needs a person so bold like you to own up,be responsive to self drive in order to make a difference. It’s only when we reflect on personal drives that we realise our strengths,weaknesses and the unique roles we can offer in different world perspectives. I am motivated and encourage you to observe further and not just see like many human beings are prone to just seeing and not taking action because it doesn’t affect attitude.Happy new year
Thanks so much, that means alot to me. Happy new year to you and your family.
Wonderful write up… No words to explain
Thanx dear one.