I wanted him to want me
I needed him to desire me
I craved for his approval
I hoped that he missed me
Enough to want to call me

I prayed
That he would call
I prayed that he would fall for me
I wanted him to love me

Mostly for my own selfish needs
I wanted to prove
That I could make him fall for me
I thought that it would disorient him

When he wasn’t calling
I was speculating
Wondering where his thoughts were
Fearing that he might have forgotten
About me and what I had to offer

I preferred to taste sweeter
Just like the forbidden fruit
In his garden of love
Not that I needed his love
No, not at all

But I wanted to triumph
To outdo myself
I wanted to have something with him
Something that we could refer to as
More than words

I wanted him to be more than a temptation
To be more than a thought
To be more than just a feeling
To be more than just a friend
With benefits

I wanted him to be my future
My tomorrow
My forever
My friend
Because I truly believed him to be my soulmate

I wanted him to be my adventure
I felt that he understood me
On a deeper level
Not in a sexual way
Not at all

He fulfilled my soul
Explored my mind
Refreshed my thoughts
He was always one to yearn for

He was my mind banger
In a good way
Thinking about him now
Makes me unsure
About how complicated our story would have been

In another life
In another setting
Probably its only in my dreams
You; would be my forever

Because you
Are my soulmate
But soulmates do not end up together
No, not in reality
They just come around
To awaken us
To light a fire in us
To remind us of how deeply we could love
To open the window to our hearts
Our eyes!
To make us feel good

Then when their time is up
They better go!
They better let go!
And so do you!
And so do I!

22 thoughts on “THE STRANGER IN MY MIND

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